Married

Oh yeah, and I'm married now.

Why Japanese kids are better than us in school.

THIS might be the most amazing peice of non-trad that I have ever seen. It's from Japan, and it's a Samsun-sponsored video with people flipping cards, turning around, etc, to create a live-action animation. Let me repeat that last little bit, LIVE-FRIKKIN-ACTION ANIMATION. Check it out.

Now it is the time on sprokets when we dance

Why, do you ask are we all dancing like uptight Germans trapped in the psychodrama of the early 1990's? Because yesterday morning-ish I went to kinkos (it's like a little Newark right here at home), but instead of leaving with only bitterness and anger, I was actually happy because, I SENT MY BOOK OUT!!! Yes, any day now the first run of el libro de Texamo will hit desks in Slingshot (Dallas), The richards Group (also Dallas) and Leo Burnett(Chicago). Now these are only "critiques" but who knows, maybe the stars will align and the gods will smile down upon me (even without the sacrifice, stupid zoning laws), and they will offer me a job; a real honest-to-god, sweet-fancy-moses, Jesus-Harold-and-Kumar JOB!!! But again, that is not guaranteed, nor is it completely likely, but hey, it's a step in the right direction, and for now, BRING ON THE KRAFTWERK!!

Killer Polaroid

This absolutely bitchin little non-trad is from a firm called Santa Clara down in Sao Paulo, Brazil. I think it might have been done before, but still it is a pretty bitchin idea. Or at least I like it, what then. Oh, and on a completely random note whomever wrote this ad for Starburst Berries and Cream, is FRIGGIN AWESOME!!!!! I think that's it is totally ingenious, and I don't care what anyone says!

Finally: JOB=HAPPINESS

At first I was a host, and it was boring; then for a while I was the assistant-manager of a cool little bar in downtown, and it was ok. But naturally the universe decided to right itself and make me hate my job again, as I was moved to the breakfast shift (read up before 5AM, six days a week), and that SUCKED. Any of you that know me, know that I am not a morning person; for me "too early" is almost any time before 2 in the afternoon (well, depending on what I have to do). So the horrible pay, incredibly long hours, complete lack of respect from both my staff and fellow management, and inability to get anything past beaurocracy finally caught up with me and I told my boss "no mas." I am now a server, bartender, and barback and I am soooooo much happier. If you're in downtown Portland and feel like Thai food, you should come in, and tip well.

Riding the g-train.

I just got Google Earth, and sweet jesus that thing is addictive. If you're playing the counting Kevin's vices home game, thats: cajun food, Futurama, energy drinks, cigars, sleep, xbox, throwing bricks off overpasses, masterbation, and drinking puppy blood. (Just kidding, I don't have a masterbation addiction).

Why do we care again?

When did being a money-grubbing whore raise someone to near-Mother-Theresa status!? Anna Nicole Smith died yesterday, and that sucks for her family, and I feel sorry for them for losing someone, but WHY DO SO MANY PEOPLE CARE!? I work at a bar and when I read it off a newswire aloud to some folks at the bar you would have thought it was someone in their family. One woman actually shed a tear! Now perhaps I am not looking at all the facts, maybe Anna Nicole truly is this wonderful woman that, for some reason, people think she is, lets make a tally.
Born in Texas (+1, would be 2, but she was born in Mexia)
Was in playboy (+1)
Moved on to actual porn (-1, now remember this is the how-close-to-a-saint-she-should-be-scale)
Let's call it "pre-Trimspa" (-1)
Marry's old rich guy (+1, good for him) for his money (-1)
Conceives old guys baby (+1) again for the money (-1)
Lenghty legal battle with guys kids (-1)
Gets own show on E! (-1, it made the Real World look like In the Actor's Studio)
Goes all Paris Hilton on her fame, but (like Paris) has no real warrant for it (-1)
Dies of "heart failure" the same way that Mama Cass "choked on a sandwich" (push until the autopsy)
TOTAL: -3
So, on that note, people you need to realize that she wasn't a saint, she didn't help ANYONE, she was only mildly entertaining (in Guess jeans or out) but not when she opened her mouth, and she was a bit of a gold digger, and we are treating her like someone who needs to be mourned. I'm sorry she died, her family must be in a hard place, but please people don't beatify this beast.

When did we get so stupid!?

So I'm sure everyone and their mother has heard about this crap in Boston about the ATHF ads. And all I'm wondering is, WHEN DID AMERICA GET ITS HEAD SO FAR UP ITS OWN ASS THAT IT STARTED TO CUT OFF THE OXYGEN TO ITS BRAIN!? I mean it though people, before you shut down a large part of the city, and a huge track of river, and arrest two people, how about you check it out!!! With all the infinite wisdom of the US government, you'd think they wouldn't mistake an ad with a picture of a fake, 2D, moon creature for a TERRORIST PLOT! And the worst part is that they arrested the guys who developed and installed the ads, but the best part is that the guys knew it was BS, so in their post-release press conference they refused to answer any questions about anything other than, "Hairstyles from the 1970's." See America, that is what happens when you let fear-mongering morons run everything, they get outsmarted by guys in their 20's who can not only recite everything that Jim Brewer wanted to eat in Half Baked, but can also explain how the Central Hudson case will completely protect them from government harrasement. If they do end up going to actual prison, I'm going to move to a place with a less judgemental government, like Kyrgystan, Belarus, or possibly Iran. The moral of this whole rant is simple: 'Just because your a dumbass doesn't mean I'm wrong."

Wow-worthy nontrad from Spain

I was clicking through AdverBox and I saw THIS wonderful peice of alternative media from Zapping, Madrid. As you will see, they sew seeds into the cover of a pressbook for "The Jungle Book 2" so, over time, the cover grows. Yes, grass sprouts from the front and back of the book and slowly engulfs it. This is definitely a wow moment, and I really want one of those books!